"The awful feeling of being irate while simultaneously feeling humiliated gave me a sneak peek as to why reasonably good people sometimes do bad things."
Powerful stuff, man. I feel like this line was the most vulnerable share of the story. When people say "I am torn," I would bet money that "torn" arose from that visceral feeling of having no idea what to do with the magnitude of the hurt except racing thoughts, back and forth at the edges. The one thing you feel sure of is that something important to you is now gone... and then you survive it. And the world is nothing like the one through that lens.
Thank you. " The one thing you feel sure of is that something important to you is now gone... and then you survive it. And the world is nothing like the one through that lens." This is so right on.
As is common in today’s society, when I read, I usually scan, skim, and graze through content to pick up the main points.
Not with your articles.
It’s like the slow food movement. I want to taste each word. Chew it thoroughly. Feel the textures on my tongue. I even find myself whispering your words to myself.
Framing this. It's funny I just watched a cooking movie with Bradley Cooper and in it he says, "I want to make food that makes people stop!" Getting people to slow down has been my goal for the last few years and love you for saying as much.
I am a people leader and this article just have me new insight onto how I can embrace my team with vulnerability - I think it can make us stronger. Ideas are brewing!
It is especially hard for those of us educated in the 20th century, or by people from the 20th century, when the thinking was we MUST AVOID being seen as vulnerable, weak, unknowing.
But who is all strong all the time?
Who is all knowing?
No one.
Really like how your team came together with you and through sharing each other's vulnerabilities you became a stronger unit.
Fabulous story about leadership Michael. Can't wait to dig into the whole book! "The entirety of my body could have fit in his left shoe while still having room for a pillow." : ) !!
Hi Michael, I loved reading this. It's so true that we don't have it all figured out. Your words remind us that asking for help is both wise and necessary. Thank you for the reminder.
We had a car dealership that sold or leased cars to people and companies.
They had 1 person selling cars to companies, and he had a big stutter.
He was nice, calm, and did his thing. We bought a car from him, and later, I learned that he was the company's top salesman and had the highest sales. He and the CEO had an argument on some silly thing, and the CEO wouldn't back down. One day, the salesperson took one of the job offers he always had and quit. Soon after, the company went bankrupt because the sales went down drastically. All customers followed the salesperson with the stutter.
Thanks for sharing this Michael as I love hearing stories like this. “Nice, calm, did his thing” is a great way to be. Wish I could have said I was the “calm” part in the article but at 25, that pissed me off and one of the few times I lost it.
I have a story in the beginning of the book of how I began to see my stutter as a strength - long and short of it is I went to a sales seminar and a big-name speaker said at the end of his talk “Oh, and if you can’t get people to open up, just stutter. They’ll see you as a human being instead of a salesperson.” Blew my mind.
When I worked at a big tech company, one salesperson tripped every time he entered the door. Voila, the ice was broken, and they started talking like people (not in a sales role). He did this to connect with the customers.
Sometimes, people say they like it when I teach because I am passionate and energetic. Teaching can be one-on-one or in a large group.
What I learned is that there are at least two ways to connect: One is to show your vulnerability, and the other is to let your energy or passion shine through and touch the other person.
Another important way is when successful people show their vulnerability. When I saw President Biden tell a stuttering boy you can be what you want, even a president, it was a great way to show anything is possible.
Norway has many rich people. Several of the richest people who started a company from scratch and made it don't have high education. They don't care what's in the way. They have a vision, and nothing stops them. The problem is just a bump in the road.
Several of my friends have dyslexia, and that doesn't stop them. They fix someone who takes care of the writing or uses AI to speak the words in the mail.
In the construction business, it's common for people to be afraid of heights. It's crazy, but it's true. It doesn´t stop them. They go as high as they can, and then the guys, without fear, do the rest. No one makes fun of them. Masculin guys show they are vulnerable, and that's normal. You respect these guys because they don't back down when it gets tough, but they also show their vulnerabilities.
I also think you should see the world from another angle. What makes you stronger, better, and wiser because of your problem (stutter, dyslexia, or whatever)?
Wow! Thank you so much for your transparency and vulnerability in this post. That sounds like a really tough situation to go through. I am so glad that the people who truly care embraced and supported you. They are the MVPS!
Wow, I can imagine how much that would have hurt. RSD probably would have made me shout-cry (snot included) right there and then.
My motto is that everything happens for a reason. Maybe this situation happened for you and your coworkers to open up (more) to each other. It's great that you turned it into a strength 🙏
Incredible story - thanks for sharing. There is a deep power in vulnerability to build connection which helps make us all strong. Quite the opposite society would have us believe, that it makes us weak.
Love your writing and storytelling Michael. And it makes me realise why I enjoy watching human drama done well. Subtle, sensitive scripts and skilled storytelling about everyday life and people are anything but banal. They make us feel seen. And okay because of all our own emotional mess-ups. And how much courage it takes to admit to them. And how beautiful is vulnerability. It's how we truly connect.
Thank you Jeanette for such a thoughtful message. Framing this one as it's the tone I'm going for for subtle, sensitive, human. Virtual hug and thank you again for all your support.
Can’t wait to learn from your skills of storytelling, Michael. It will be a treat. Especially as your tone is subtle, sensitive, and human. Rare to find these days!
"The awful feeling of being irate while simultaneously feeling humiliated gave me a sneak peek as to why reasonably good people sometimes do bad things."
Powerful stuff, man. I feel like this line was the most vulnerable share of the story. When people say "I am torn," I would bet money that "torn" arose from that visceral feeling of having no idea what to do with the magnitude of the hurt except racing thoughts, back and forth at the edges. The one thing you feel sure of is that something important to you is now gone... and then you survive it. And the world is nothing like the one through that lens.
Thank you. " The one thing you feel sure of is that something important to you is now gone... and then you survive it. And the world is nothing like the one through that lens." This is so right on.
As is common in today’s society, when I read, I usually scan, skim, and graze through content to pick up the main points.
Not with your articles.
It’s like the slow food movement. I want to taste each word. Chew it thoroughly. Feel the textures on my tongue. I even find myself whispering your words to myself.
Thank you.
Framing this. It's funny I just watched a cooking movie with Bradley Cooper and in it he says, "I want to make food that makes people stop!" Getting people to slow down has been my goal for the last few years and love you for saying as much.
I’ve seen that movie. And I remember loving that scene!
Agree!
I am a people leader and this article just have me new insight onto how I can embrace my team with vulnerability - I think it can make us stronger. Ideas are brewing!
So great to hear Melissa and thank you for taking the time.
So brave of you to publish this Michael.
It is especially hard for those of us educated in the 20th century, or by people from the 20th century, when the thinking was we MUST AVOID being seen as vulnerable, weak, unknowing.
But who is all strong all the time?
Who is all knowing?
No one.
Really like how your team came together with you and through sharing each other's vulnerabilities you became a stronger unit.
Cheers.
Thank you Ramon. It's from one of my favorite chapters in my book about how I learned to "lead from behind" and embrace honesty and supporting people.
'...the world made me believe the word “vulnerable” was synonymous with “insecure” or “weak.”'
It's disappointing that we have such regressive and harmful societal beliefs that are imposed on us, thus affecting our self-worth and self-esteem
We need to push back against such beliefs.
Yes we do.
Fabulous story about leadership Michael. Can't wait to dig into the whole book! "The entirety of my body could have fit in his left shoe while still having room for a pillow." : ) !!
So glad you picked out that line Rick as it's one of my favorite in the book;).
Hi Michael, I loved reading this. It's so true that we don't have it all figured out. Your words remind us that asking for help is both wise and necessary. Thank you for the reminder.
Refreshingly honest. Can't wait for your book!
Thank you Lala for the support.
We had a car dealership that sold or leased cars to people and companies.
They had 1 person selling cars to companies, and he had a big stutter.
He was nice, calm, and did his thing. We bought a car from him, and later, I learned that he was the company's top salesman and had the highest sales. He and the CEO had an argument on some silly thing, and the CEO wouldn't back down. One day, the salesperson took one of the job offers he always had and quit. Soon after, the company went bankrupt because the sales went down drastically. All customers followed the salesperson with the stutter.
Thanks for sharing this Michael as I love hearing stories like this. “Nice, calm, did his thing” is a great way to be. Wish I could have said I was the “calm” part in the article but at 25, that pissed me off and one of the few times I lost it.
I have a story in the beginning of the book of how I began to see my stutter as a strength - long and short of it is I went to a sales seminar and a big-name speaker said at the end of his talk “Oh, and if you can’t get people to open up, just stutter. They’ll see you as a human being instead of a salesperson.” Blew my mind.
When I worked at a big tech company, one salesperson tripped every time he entered the door. Voila, the ice was broken, and they started talking like people (not in a sales role). He did this to connect with the customers.
Sometimes, people say they like it when I teach because I am passionate and energetic. Teaching can be one-on-one or in a large group.
What I learned is that there are at least two ways to connect: One is to show your vulnerability, and the other is to let your energy or passion shine through and touch the other person.
Another important way is when successful people show their vulnerability. When I saw President Biden tell a stuttering boy you can be what you want, even a president, it was a great way to show anything is possible.
Norway has many rich people. Several of the richest people who started a company from scratch and made it don't have high education. They don't care what's in the way. They have a vision, and nothing stops them. The problem is just a bump in the road.
Several of my friends have dyslexia, and that doesn't stop them. They fix someone who takes care of the writing or uses AI to speak the words in the mail.
In the construction business, it's common for people to be afraid of heights. It's crazy, but it's true. It doesn´t stop them. They go as high as they can, and then the guys, without fear, do the rest. No one makes fun of them. Masculin guys show they are vulnerable, and that's normal. You respect these guys because they don't back down when it gets tough, but they also show their vulnerabilities.
I also think you should see the world from another angle. What makes you stronger, better, and wiser because of your problem (stutter, dyslexia, or whatever)?
Wow! Thank you so much for your transparency and vulnerability in this post. That sounds like a really tough situation to go through. I am so glad that the people who truly care embraced and supported you. They are the MVPS!
Indeed they are. I loved that team and had some great times together with them. Thank you for the support BEE. It means a lot.
@Michael Thompson Aww! That’s awesome to hear. You’re welcome!
There's power all over this story.
Vulnerability is the first thing we often time look for in circumstances because it's what builds connection in a lasting foundational way.
I never heard it put as an 'act of generosity' but I don't think I'll be able to see it any other way.
Thanks for sharing this story and being courageous to simply be who you are.
<3
Thanks so much for sharing. Vulnerability is the most underrated superpower.
Wow, I can imagine how much that would have hurt. RSD probably would have made me shout-cry (snot included) right there and then.
My motto is that everything happens for a reason. Maybe this situation happened for you and your coworkers to open up (more) to each other. It's great that you turned it into a strength 🙏
Incredible story - thanks for sharing. There is a deep power in vulnerability to build connection which helps make us all strong. Quite the opposite society would have us believe, that it makes us weak.
Beautiful writing ❤️ what an amazing act of courage to return to your office after all of that happened.
Love your writing and storytelling Michael. And it makes me realise why I enjoy watching human drama done well. Subtle, sensitive scripts and skilled storytelling about everyday life and people are anything but banal. They make us feel seen. And okay because of all our own emotional mess-ups. And how much courage it takes to admit to them. And how beautiful is vulnerability. It's how we truly connect.
Thank you Jeanette for such a thoughtful message. Framing this one as it's the tone I'm going for for subtle, sensitive, human. Virtual hug and thank you again for all your support.
Can’t wait to learn from your skills of storytelling, Michael. It will be a treat. Especially as your tone is subtle, sensitive, and human. Rare to find these days!